I Lost The Dark at Dawn

As I lay in the bed uneasy. I knew, felt it, sensed it. Circling our log cabin, slowly. No noise. But it was there. I tried to tell myself it was just owls in the surrounding woods. I lay awake all night in a heightened state of terror.

Earlier that evening. Whilst enjoying a log burner, relaxing evening. I’d suddenly got a rush of dread, demanded that Ange immediately close and lock the patio doors and shut all curtains. Things can’t see in…

Something in the beginnings of that dark night summoned itself scared me deeply.

It has been a September stay in Somerset. With a hot tub, day trip to Lyme Regis, Adventures. We had arrived relieved and excited for a relaxing break.

I’ve always felt and sensed more than some. A curse in some ways. In others a blessing of super feelings. My dreams have always been graphically real, strange. If my passing from this life is as exciting and psychedelic as these and leads me to peace, I have no complaints! Walking through the veil can leave be miffed, disturbed and exhausted upon waking. It also brings fantastic feelings of hope, positivity Guardian Angel reassurance. They present a beautiful feminine and recognised energy to me and visit in differing forms.

When I encounter earth bound recognitions. It’s inspiring, gets me out of fugs and funks. Restores faith in the good souls.

Whatever ‘it’ was, I knew that if it had entered our cabin. If I’d have seen it. I would have been changed forever. I did feel danger physically.

I don’t believe it was just an animal either. I had werewolves and got myself in a right state about it for hours of restless terror.

When I told Ange about it the next morning. She had slept soundly. Putting it down to be de-stressing from work. I felt different and strongly disagreed.

I’ve never forgotten this experience. I would never be brave enough to confront what lurked that night. Apart from that one strange night. We had a wonderful time.

Do I fear dangerous humans? Or the darkness that lurks.

Moonlight, starry skies. The changing from dusk to dawn is magical. Some of formative years were spend sleepless and nocturnal. Working night shifts, walking home to the sunrise and comfort, deepest of sleep and daytime dreams.

The visitations more intense.

Going back ever younger, as a child. One night the multiple voices were chattering. In the room I shared with my Sister, in my head? I recall shouting “Stop!”

They did.

I’d sometimes think about skeletons, and feel a deep emptiness.

A curiosity with the great beyond has been present from early childhood.

Whatever gifts we are given. A certain responsibility comes with them.

How much to share before judgements are made? Sharing with the likeminded.

The fascinating mind, thoughts, experiences. Past lives, flashes, Deja vu. Regression, answers lead to acceptance and focus on journeys.

Spirituality, dimensions, spirits, esotericism, cryptozoology, UFO’s fascinate me.

When I moved back to live at my parents, after a ‘lost time’ renting rooms. Or the occasions before that when I’d stayed in my old bedroom.

I’d be asleep, or dozing. Suddenly.. I felt something approaching on the landing. It would enter the room (door closed) go to the end of the bed. Then walk up my legs and sit.

Initially I was silently freaked out. Feeling a physical presence. Not wanting to look in case I saw ‘it.’ Falling asleep and upon waking, telling myself it’s just me dreaming.

But the repetition. This entity didn’t feel bad. It’s felt quite positive. There energy, I can only describe as ‘shimmering.’

Fast forward to Ange and I getting together and embracing our spiritual path.

I mentioned it after another encounter. She instantly said – it’s your Grandads dog. She is looking after your dad.

It was Katie. A Yorkshire Terrier. ( now the size of the physical experience made sense )

I felt relief, emotional. I remember that doggie from childhood.

Ange helps others now with ‘house cleansing.’ If a spirit is causing a problem, it’s ok. Ange helps them into the light. Helps them release ties with this world. Sometimes they are stranded, stubborn, or just don’t realise they are dead. Scared to face the music after things they have done whilst alive..

Angela Barker Tarot House and business cleansing

When I was in the folk band ‘The Idolins’ we had met in a pub beer garden. A few drinks later. I was conversing with friend about some difficulties he was experiencing. It took a strange and frightening turn of events. I suddenly felt tight chested. Like something suddenly grabbed me. It felt like claws digging in. Freaking out I shouted Ange. She ‘saw it.’ Grabbed it and removed it.

I could breathe again. A dark entity? Soul, Demon? That when I realised Ange’s true abilities with these things. Some of the people there found it funny, sniggering. Spoke volumes to me.

Another realisation in life- when hanging about the wrong sorts – for me, not fitting in. Thinking all along, it’s my social insecurities. When all along – it’s just incompatibility. Being around genuine spiritual folk makes me far more comfortable. At that time I was opening up . My energies were open…. Maybe too open, when made me vulnerable to an attempted attachment of something. A lesson for me… it took a while… years.

Even though I’m very open about myself and beliefs. I thrive in good compatible company. It makes it so much easier to understand why I struggle so much in muggleland. The escape plan is very real… and enjoyable.

Whatever doors, a jar, fully opened. I think are part of my gifts. My creativity cannot be capped off, put away. It only bursts out with a happy vengeance. This is why the channeling of music is not only self therapy. But a life’s work. Maybe angels, others are speaking through my fingers. As like I’ve said before. I have very few memories of performing. The ‘trance’ is blissful. The result recorded sounds wonderful to me. I don’t question it. I just go with it with gratitude.

There was a flat we lived in Basford. A previous relationship and girlfriend that also saw dead people. My Grandma Ivy ( I think ) … a blond woman sat regularly at the end of our bed often. Something terrifying, claustrophobic lurked there, it was a very unhealthy place that made me ill – as well as the damp. my girlfriend moved out. My mum ended up

kicking off with the estate agents. Before I moved to a house. I ended up getting dumped, truly heart broken and went through a messy time, a lonely time, a self destructive time. From this.. getting dragged into other peoples dramas… has done me no good in life. The older I get. The effects and mental drain get worse. Even though I have a bursting desire to genuinely help others. I have to walk away and shut off. I’m not a councillor or therapist. Practice of Reiki, music, thrashing the cross trainer, good food and meditation. The love of Ange, our pets, family, good friends… Adventures and spiritual positive living help me.

I may have an active imagination. But I pick up ‘vibes.’ I just have a radar of highly attuned sensitivity to some things. Whilst switching off to a lot of what I feel – mundane day to day stuff.

Then there was the happenings at flat at Bestwood Park….the chains….ancient burial grounds….. when I woke and saw him.

Big high five to the weirdos, the unaccepted, the folks on your spirituality journeys. It’s a hell of a ride.

You can read more awakenings, experiences and what led to here in my Kindle book – Claudsville Blogs and Biog of a Bog Woppit.

Earth Tree Healing. New Age, Spiritual and instrumental music for meditation and relaxation Music links

You can also follow Adventures With Clange on our YouTube platform. These are mine, Ange’s records of trips, food, family. Check out the older playlists too from my Claudine West Channel.

Human Spirit, Interaction and Vibrations

Being amongst your tribe is endearing. Having been an outsider, the difficult misunderstood angry, sulky and strange middle child, Lesbian, 5 feet 11″ tall, needing corrective facial surgery for a deformity at 19 years old. More tomboy than girlie girl. Never have and never will fit in. (maybe in another life for the shits and giggles?) Some elements society have not been kind in this one. Social, emotional coping at times is hard, continues. We are the creation of our genetics, Soul Journey, experiences, past lives and environments. My compensation for this has always been the gift musical and artistic talent. The ability to become the hermit and nomad wannabe – with the travel (Escape from ‘Muggletown’) Out of it all. I acknowledge what causes me stress and anxiety, work on how to make that better. Still piss Ange off – my Lady love of life and drive her up the walls and to despair at times. But we have more fun than domestics. (Ange do a pie chart if you want to argue!) P.S. total grammatical correctness eludes me.

On a side thought… you know when you wake up and the whole bedroom smells of fart, was it me, was it Ange? Was it both? As teamwork makes the dream work.

That is what Pattie Pops thinks!

By no means do I music envy major financial success and fame. If I have enough to be comfortable and pay the bills. I’m blessed. The interbred in-crowd bum chums self back patting is not for me. Put me in a room of strangers and ask me to network, talk ‘the’ talk. You simply put me in a nightmare. A face that never fitted even after surgery is fine by me. Focus on creation of ones art and music, and making that good, inspired, energy that flows from somewhere of beautiful connection. Put me in a room of like minded spiritual folk and it all becomes a hell of a lot easier.

On the note of escape. Neither of us pretend to want to remain in Nottingham. We want out. It is time to move on. If I had the opportunity tomorrow. I’d pack my knickers and the cats and go! Ange and I, with a serendipitous worlds colliding discussion over the weekend, lightbulb moments, (Bamboo style salt lamp for us – Thanks Dathan!) of another Ange and synchronicity thrown in. Hope and happiness, opportunities of a better future. Our goal and dream is to live on, work on and open to likeminded souls, the Earth Tree Retreat. We’ve looked at Somerset, Lincolnshire, Wales, Canada, Portugal, other countries. Planning permission is challenging. Money needs to be manifested. We are prepared to start off in our caravan in a field.

But Cornwall… Yes Cornwall! Small seeds, big ideas. Wild flower fields. Practical business beginnings….. Guitars…..Art 😉

The mere mention of the ins and outs of human interaction and imposed restrictions, mask wearing and social distancing. Debating the corrupt shit show that the present procrastinating UK Government is….= Sleaze, cronyism, lobbying, PPE procurement scandals… Shameful, disappointing but not surprising. Greed over life and well being. It goes on and on… Karma, Karma, Karma. The Agarthians, Greys, Reptilians, Tall Whites, must be face planting until it makes a sucky slapping sound…. unless of course…

Microsoft Teams shows the real you! ‘They Live’

For all of the arguments, conspiracies, fact, fiction, propaganda, manipulation and opinion. I work in the NHS. I chose that career ‘day job’ because I wanted to help serve patients, poorly people, do something good. It’s not easy, stressful at times. But I’m grateful of the opportunities given. The choice in life to sloth, do nothing with it, receive benefits, ‘poor me’ for ‘poor me’s’ sake or…drum roll… work hard, train, get education, create and embrace opportunities and contribute. Is far more satisfying to me personally. (Disclaimer for the people with real genuine needs) – excluding the fakers, ‘can’t cook, as don’t need to cook, when its all offered on a plate.’ ‘Can do but won’t do.’ Lazy ones whose own worlds apparently owe them something. Now I know some of you cherubs think you have had it hard. There is always someone worse off. It’s not all about you.

On a serious note though. If you are struggling, do seek help. It’s very easy to give advice, rather than deal with your own problems. There is mostly a solution to things. We’ve been given the greatest gift of life adventures. Wasting it, as it’s sometimes far too short, is a regret once you take that peek back from the big sky. Don’t let the bastards get you down either.

We sets me off? PMT, dark winters, work stress. (For however much longer I stay in the NHS very much depends on my experiences in the next 6 months) Keeping topped up with Spiritual practices, meditation/Reiki, exercise, fruit and veg, music, vitamin D and a few good supplements helps my moods immensely. Joy vacuums are best avoided. I have a great faith and strength in the fact that everything is OK. The folk who drag me into their problems, every single time I see them.. it’s a drain. It’s an absolute pleasure when I spend time fun. I was discussing the other day about that rollercoaster some of us experience with people. Sometimes the ones that you look up to, get inspired, learn from massively let themselves and you down with bad actions and behaviours. I’ve found. Sometimes people are in your life for a time, not forever for a reason. It’s an interesting journey. Never lose hope. Not everyone is a fooking wanker! But…. I’m never surprised at the barrage of moaners that are not prepared to stand up and take productive action with their issues. Bitterness and Ego are a recipe for disaster.

Here you go: the advice from 1000 self help books. In a world where the only one that can truly help you once guided (if needed) is actually (newsflash) you. A place where its easier to say rather than do. Denial is a disease. It’s sitting on a bench, looking at a crappy view of a wall, letting pigeons shit on your head.

I also don’t fancy getting a nasty virus so am being extra careful. The End. Well anyway….

During a UK pandemic lockdown easing and happening of our first Well Being Market in April 2021. So, the weekend 24th & 25th April 2021. Our first wellbeing Show, post lockdown easing. Ange and I were very excited. Hardly slept… a negative Lateral Flow Test later. Nostril ticking, throat gag reflex.

Having kept sensible and safe and possibly very lucky too – (this is not a blame game for those who decide to superspread Covid Juice, possibly to vulnerable others, who possibly don’t have super human love and light immune systems.. with their own beliefs)

Just maybe if the dictatorial ‘influencers’ and the spreaders of doom and gloom, hate could maybe be more influential to their social media readers. If they actually just posted positive stuff, ideas, inspiration, their very own fabulous experiences… Hey Ho kidlets …. I see, read, terrible things that humans do. Humans = Kingdom of cock nuggets! Conspiracies – some scary, some hilarious, some food for thought, some poorly evidenced. I’m glad Netflix saved me from reading some of the shite spouted.

2 UK lockdowns later. Our first vaccination done. I’ve not mutated into a reptilian yet. But have cookies, 50p and a Mars bar, organic produce and Tena Lady on hand if needed.

It all is given to Angela Barker if I clog pop (Will is written) and please do help animals.

So…

We had both arrived at the very well ventilated, helping prevent others being on ventilators venue in Newark, Nottinghamshire! Lizian Events Well Being Market. Reassured with completed with negative Lateral Flow tests, followed up with Negative results after the show (Yes a responsible thing to do, yes nothing is 100%) yes there is a YouTube video for just about everything.

I’ve got some underlying health box tickers. I am also mostly responsible for my lifestyle choices, past and present dear health Gurus. I don’t like lurgy of any kind at the best of times or having the shits. So, even though only space suits and ‘no one can hear you scream’ territory are possibly better protection. A medical mask, not a cloth fashion statement…. whilst wandering amongst population may offer some protection from covid/other spatter juice. If someone spat in your face. Would you rather be wearing a mask, or open your mouth and accept the full on phlegm monster is coming? Your choice. I still remember poor Sue on checkouts at Tesco, who was the correct small height for customers sneezing literally directly in her face. A job I suffered in and was always ill in. = Touching money, close public contact, viruses. Glad I left. Some good memories of some fun folks and times though. Lots of bad memories of dick heads (staff and customers) and abuse. Glad I got out, grew up, learned a few harsh lessons and became a better person.

So…I spent the weekend, mainly outside playing my hand pan & tongue drums. Supporting Taiji, with Dr Don & Carol Harradine. ‘Dance of Life.’

Alan Wood (Native American Traditions) Sage Cleansing Ceremony. Angela Barker – Fenix Flames Guided Meditations. (I took my acoustic guitar. I’ll wait until the June Show for more performing)

I’d kicked off the weekend vibrationally with The Pyramid Lady – Gong Sound Therapy by Richard Hissitt. I had a session. Solfeggio tuned metal healing pipes.

Whilst in session I experienced pulsing waves of purple, angelic wings, a feeling of heat, safety, alignment with the Universe. Afterwards, pain relied in my knees, well being, relaxation.

Even though I’ve worked with sound and vibrations most of my life. I was a gong bath virgin until a few years ago. Now I’m an addict. I’ve encountered other worldly beings and bliss. If you’ve not tried one. I can only but recommend.

Music has kept me occupied, satisfied, and accomplished during this hell of a strange 12 Months. Freedom in Pandemic Prison. The meditation escape. Fabulous darlings.

The weekend was a success. Great community spirit. I’m trying to work my way round talking to the exhibitors show by show, to get to know them and what they do. Such a treat after shielding through what has been a long dark winter.

I have my CD’s now for sale. I’m not a sales woman. 18 years of abuse and personal insecurities working in retail. That damage imprint is lasting. Sometime small children take one look at me and their faces say ‘what are you?’ Bob 2? I put the ones that don’t get or connect with me off with Claud vibes.. It grips Anges shit! Can’t talk the talk. Leave it to Ange, best way. She is focusing on her businesses Fenix Flames/Publishing & Angela Barker Tarot. Here business and financial survival (not through the governments grants through lockdown as being newly self employed was entitled to nothing. We sleep better knowing we did not vote them in) Survival through the Lockdowns and thriving business is a testimony to how successful and good she is as a Tarot Reader. She has not stopped. Just adapted readings to do them virtually. Being able to support and help others positively is a life satisfying career.

Website Angela Barker Tarot | Guided By Spirits

Maybe in time again I’ll get better at sales technique. So I stick to what I love and a good at – musical contributions at the shows. Lockdown provided the finances for CD duplication of some of my Earth Tree Healing albums.

Earth Tree Healing Music

Yes a blatant plug here if you want a physical copy via Fenix Flames >>> Music

Ange and Ashley are the sales and business talent and drive for not only Fenix Flames with, but for Earth Tree Healing. A massive gratitude high five. Especially Ash for helping with the CD artwork duplications and bits.

Too many great people and businesses to mention at the show.

So spend some time on https://lizianevents.org

Enormous thanks to Liz and Ian for their continued support and opportunities.

We originally began as visitors to the shows. Through them, we’ve met friends for life, learned lots via the talks, networked, spent lots on nice and esoteric gifts. Established businesses as stall holders thanks to their support. Honoring the memory and creations of Sarah Louise Kay.

Remember if you do anything this week… be kind. I don’t judge what you identify as. People/Aliens to be are beyond a physical presence. It is your soul honey. You can be a celestial megagon sided rainbow non binary with flashing lights, cheesecake as hair, with bum warts that whistle, that is referred to only by thought, if it makes you feel acknowledged important, noticed and nice. If you behave badly, that is what you are remembered as and known as to me.

~ Claudine

Music Links and Kindle Link to my book, ‘Claudsville Blogs and Biog of a Bog Woppit.’

https://linktr.ee/earthtreehealing

Gong and Pyramid Power

Composing FRIGG – Goddess 2

As spring catapults my happy vibes into sunshine land. A few days annual leave in lockdown has allowed some serious home studio time. (A needed break from NHS day job land)
I spent the day composing & recording FRIGG for my 2022 album – GODDESS 2. I wanted to experiment and challenge myself with a lot more live instruments, rather than just midi sounds on Logic Pro X.
A brilliant wellbeing boost.
We had got up early to venture to the river (a local blessing during pandemic restrictions) having done a long walk the previous day (for us) on the journey to better fitness. My knees were murderous following it. Venturing out, whilst social distancing during shielding is a novelty. But after lockdown #1 over indulgences and laziness during working from home. (It’s started so well too!) We have both incorporated healthier eating and much needed exercise into lockdown 3. No crisps on the monthly internet shop! I do love Ange’s swearing and BF’s when we get the delivery of bulk goods that she lugs into the kitchen. Rarely will we need to visit supermarkets now. Farm shops selling local produce from small businesses is our weekly fresh shopping. I can’t thank The Real Milk Company enough.

It’s a long, but sensible road ahead…. (I won’t be posting weigh ins on social media – as it pisses me off when others do it, to only put twice as much weight back on, once their ‘diets’ end) We are entertaining some of the secret stalkers and virtually interacting with Ange’s family down south with ‘Ange’s lockdown Gousto live cooking videos’ and other troffing experiences. We can’t eat out, so eating in is the new thing. Can’t beat a good cull and unfollow or others uninteresting, joy vacuuming negative and argumentative shite. Give me Batzilla the bat or @celinaspookboo frankly hilarious sleepwalking exploits on TikTok any day.

Ours is a gradual lifestyle change. Removal of unhealthy snacks and better managing portion sizes, along with exercise is making both of us feel better.

Watching the sunrise through river mists is an ethereal experience. Whilst hints of winter still cools ones toes. The sunshine warms up my hope for better days of freedom outdoors and normality. With our April Cyprus holiday cancelled. Ange & my sister in law are surprising us with a mystery 2022 big holiday abroad. I love a good surprise! We frantically scrambled to book a short Cornwall break (lockdown end permitting) in May. So at least we get to see the sea. Fingers, legs and fanny crossed!


Ange had her covid vaccine. So whilst pandering to her every need (as she had mine afterwards) copious cups of tea. I spent Sunday 28th Feb 2021 having a wonderful indulgent time improvising aka composing. Featuring acoustic guitar, tongue drums, kalimba, tambourine, baroque organ and love eggs.
Whereas filming myself does disrupt my creative flow slightly, it really is a great way to remember my journey. Watch my video of the session here. A really good accomplished day. It also feels good to get out of a PMT driven funk.

Here are some of our river videos

TTFN – Claud

Only Human After All

It’s now February 2021.

I had the Oxford jabsy vaccination yesterday.

It’s 5am. Our cat Rambo is pestering me in bed, and being a pesky annoyance harassing us for the last few nights lots…in his springtime excitement

My arm is hurting. Otherwise – feeling pretty good so far. Bar lethargic today and needed an afternoon kip.

I received a shielding letter yesterday – even though I’ve been very safe, careful and home working for the majority of the pandemic. I have some box ticking underlying health conditions. (Which I’m working on to improve, with support from my health providers)

Yes sometimes in moments my worse fears have been present. To my knowledge I haven’t had COVID or needed to test for it. But for all I know maybe I have? I’ve had the odd few days in the last year of feeling a bit rough, some sinus headaches, weather changes and a nasty UTI when Tipsy our cat got ill and put to sleep.

All those other viruses did not just go away. Bar getting it from the local cob shop. We’ve been pretty lucky when ‘super spreading’ has been allegedly rife everywhere.

We had a good virtual catch up via Zoom with friends last night. Netflix binge watching recommendations were plentiful. Along with a hilarious sleepwalking ‘checkout operator’ In bed story. Involving the contents of bedside cabinet being scanned into ‘under the covers.’ The realisation that nearly a year of this has gone by. Reminiscent recalls of those old times of hugs, holidays and socialising in the flesh. Wow! Facebook memory lane!

Watched a really funny film ‘Booksmart.’ Our sense of humour too.

With an easing of lockdown in the UK on the horizon. We are accepting – this year will, in many ways be restricted with movement and interaction with loved ones. This thing can’t last forever… well we will see!

Making the most of a crazy circumstance been the enabler for us : A productive working from home regime with the many facets of what we do.

Indeed opportunities knocked, were manifested and embraced. Adapt and conquer, or don’t.

With an improved and growing international reach of my Music. Ange’s businesses in the world of Tarot, book publishing, herbs, oils & candles are thriving.

Survival – financially, physically, practically and emotionally was the goal from lockdown 1. Yes we did it.

Be in no doubt, we have had our ‘moments.’ Some domestic arguments, irritated each other at times.

But perseverance and positive thinking remains the dominant thing. Days job stresses are my main trigger, followed by the approach to perimenopausal beginnings. Yes some low days. (See previous blog) But mainly good and productive days.

From the start of lockdown 1. I made a promise to myself to be productive with my passion – music. An album ‘GODS’ some enriching and ongoing collaborative work. I’m now working on a new album Goddess 2 for 2022. Let us not forget, the release of our live, raw improvised album via Stinking Rita band – Live From Studio Five (recorded in between lockdown restrictions last year in a rehearsal studio)

Spare time from full time day jobsy in the NHS & studying for a CIPS qualification is spent musically. (Bar killing a few zombie hoards on the PlayStation) it has become a productive Groundhog Day.

Leisure time is spent holidaying and exploring otherworldly interests and posting cooking videos via YouTube.

After a brief cold spell. We are venturing out locally for nature walks- the cross trainer has been my winter mode of good sweats.

Ange & I have indeed become weary and frustrated of our lack of freedom to travel – but have been good girls with the imposed ‘rules.’ The long dark winter months are never a favourite time of the year. Switching off the horrors, speculations of the media and reading books, listening to podcasts has been the way for me to distract from the shite of what we are presented with.

Disconnection has been healthy for me – as am not a social butterfly. Becoming even less so over the years. Keeping good friends close and everyone else at a distance virtually is good for me. Yes you can see my activities and sharings, (a record of memories for Clange)

I don’t look much at what others are up to, which in some ways is disconnecting.

In our home environment – we are de cluttering slowly. Filling every wall space left in the house with wall tapestries. Mystical additions to salt lamps with mellow lighting has improved our surroundings and limited space.

I did have a very busy and in some ways shitty dark January- good riddance you sticky stinky arsehole with fleas and piles!

Even my sad lamp stuttered. But a Gousto delivered meals regime of some very nice food, cooked live on Facebook & YouTube 4 nights a week by Ange is like eating out, at home.

https://youtube.com/channel/UCPQcD0P6MHFET1ksQ0XT2fA

Whilst not costing us the earth. Our food waste has definitely declined. It’s just the extra cardboard packaging. (That we recycle)

This new, free from supermarket visits life is great. Once a month, a staple goods online delivery. Weekly fresh food from Gousto & our farm shop. Has saved time & money for us.

We have enjoyed some weekend takeaway deliveries from ‘Filthy Vegan.’ A monster kebab with hot sauce!

As a regime of gradual and healthy weight loss fills us with wellbeing. (the odd blip week when the scales just say – “slightly disappointed, but don’t give up- if you don’t order naughty snacks – you can’t eat them bitches.”

Lessons… progress. Positive habit changes.

Ange did a lovely thing the other day. We are both very aware that others are not as fortunate as us. We are by no means wealthy with money. We are abundant and grateful of everything else.

We had a good month. So Ange went out and bought and donated some staple food stuffs (and a cake for the volunteers) who are providing cheap and free cooked meals at a local community centre.

Whilst also supporting animal charities, which we continue to do. It’s nice to not be selfish.

A big high five to those of you that have fund raised for good causes, volunteered, done your bit and philanthropists. Paying it forward feels good.

We were talking last night about how judgemental and dictatorial some folk have become… these post notification social media keyboard warriors, self professed experts ‘Ranting Twats’ in their chosen field of being fucking obnoxious and entitled. Yep.. we’ve all seen it and cringed, unfollowed, un friended. Not that this virtual reality of social media ‘friendships’ truly fills the void of human to human interaction.

The path to Dystopian nightmares in gaining traction. With technological distraction.

Ban your mobile phone for an hour and focus on the physical… wow… therapy for the addicts.

Weaned off the loneliness of virtual reality… now that is an impossible task for some.

I remember 10p in a phone box was the thing when I was a kid.

How times have changed.

Along with living amongst potholes, bodge jobs with no longevity of the fix, (as there is no money, a lot of wasted money in a failed energy company too. Why, when you are not experts or the monopoly in that field even attempt it!) – have a looksie too at Denmark’s plastic recycled roads. Oh and really bad inconsiderate drivers are everywhere, road hogging cyclists and a city that needs some TLC when it opens up again. I have visions of cities in the Walking Dead!

Then, there are the ones, that are able to articulate sensibly their opinions and have a decent debate, when these things differ from others. I prefer them.

Ange and I are intrigued by some Nordic areas and ways of life and are planning a visit.

We have been encouraged by ideas, proposals and support the Nottingham Green Quarter group, Nottingham Cohousing & Good Food Partneship. https://www.facebook.com/groups/nottinghamgreenquarter/?ref=share

I’m not a fan of the greyness and unsustainable greed of cities.

Ethical and sustainable approaches in business and living is paramount to our future.

Even though Ange and I are craving travel and road trips. (And are adventuring in food atm) Planning and researching is fun and fills us with excitement. Most importantly – hope.

Nearly a year of Pandemic (for whatever the real truths are around this thing) has left us restricted, grieving, struggling at times, but mainly resilient, productive and resourceful. Some have not opted for that route. I’ve interacted and listened with people who have experienced isolation, fear, rejection, mental health issues and it’s really is a sad thing.

Anxiety (I’ve had some worrying episodes) is the controlling mystery monster that never truly explains why when it exits its hole! But techniques, meditation, Reiki, reassurance, talking about it, has helped me combat that dark, bleak, empty, terrifying, panic entity in my mind.

There is also that elephant in my rooms of subconscious. The dreaming. An ocean of visual delights, horrors, strange need. My brain, soul, past lives are creating a murmuration of a party in my pants. I experience life times during those REM sleeps. The weird, the re digested is put into Claud’s mixing bowl of night movies and spat out. Recently hanging out with Tom Cruise (nothing sexual, even for a lesbian)

I don’t journal my dreams. I’ve already sought and found my mission and messages in the life (by no means does this mean I’m a complete enlightened being yet) I am cracking on with that journey. With the downs and ups that brings.

I’m now focussing on the beautiful awakenings of spring, walks by the river, blossom, the freshening of air.

The lilley pads in the lake. Those still moments of joy and breathing. Nature connection. The big wide sky. A little bit of tree hugging harmed no one and no thing.

As always – making music saved and saves me from an apocalypse in mind, soul and body parts. I can wrap myself up in it, never mind what is outside my creative cocoon.

Sobriety (mostly I have an unpleasant after effect of feeling depressed from drinking. Tea and a clearer head, has been the better version of me for a number of years) and spirituality is the path my twenty something I was weary of and uneducated in. This is now my (lot better) reality.

These thinking early woke hours, spent manifesting good things. Along with lesser times chewing over the bad and forcing myself free of those voices and frustrations. A mindfulness exorcism is something needed. Or a pep talk along the lines of ‘sort your shit out!’

Good days and bad days exist.

But…. the future, as well as the present should be embraced with all the positivity the world can muster. Survival and wellbeing. I’m sure there will be lots with a whole bucket list of regrets in hindsight, who did not invent or embrace opportunities, but dwell and place blame. Effort is sometime painful, exhausting. When I’ve failed an exam. I studied harder, sacrificed more free leisure time and retook to gain a distinction. Pleased? Accomplished? Hell yes!

But even with successes and failures. The effort of doing and trying is very rewarding. I much more enjoy the journeys than indulging the end results. As soon as one journey is finished, I don’t want to remain still, but embark on another.

With a daily routine of gratitude and appreciating loved ones and all that extra time with our cats. We journey on in this….adventure.

I am only human here…. after all. (Please excuse typos.. you get the gust)

My music links https://linktr.ee/earthtreehealing

Rambo #hurtstits
Rambo #hurtsboobies

From Relentless to Glastonbury

It is September 2020 already. Yes. We managed to get a holiday. We’ve just returned from time well spent in Glastonbury. After along weekend in Portsmouth visiting family, day in Lyme Regis – lying on the beach, watching (laughing at) the militant seagulls attack and swoop down on unsuspecting small children and adult’s lunches.

The recharge was needed. We both love Somerset and feel very connected to it.

Littlemead – Drinking Mead, Meare, Glastonbury

We have both been fortunate to do a little travelling in ‘Fanny.’ Exploring the rolling big wide open spaces and skies of Lincolnshire have fed us lockdown respite freedom during recent months. We do live opposite a country park with lakes and a river so have been lucky. A few doom curing early morning bike rides have done me good.

Lincolnshire

We’d enjoyed the Summer Solstice sunrise from the river near us.

Hoveringham, River Trent

At least once a year we head to Somerset. We come here to detox not ‘retox.’ So the days spent relaxing, eating vegetarian lunches at Rainbows End Café. (Amazing veggie good food for body and soul) A good clearing was experienced. We both had a fantastic and very needed massage by Ana @ https://www.naturalconnect.co.uk/ (eternally grateful) Puts once back on track, resets.

I found the readjustment back to work and ‘normal’ the following week pretty tough. Ange and I constantly plan our escapes.

There are a few new videos on our Adventures with Clange YouTube playlist.

Adventures With Clange

Musically. Well. No furlough. (For me that would have been a creatively indulgent bliss) But working from home March until September, enabled me to spend that extra time that was commuting, composing music for an 81 track Wu Wei Wisdom Project. The Tao Te Ching. (more of that when its officially announced. Thank you Alex and David for the honour- It has and is a beautiful experience) https://www.wuweiwisdom.com/free-resources-blog/ Some of my music is featured below.

I have a true love for animals. Its very easy to share the horrors of the world on social media. Does it stop people doing bad things? Does it stop nature being nature? Does it make folks become Vegan/ Vegetarian? Maybe (plants have feelings too) Have you been in the presence of an old tree and felt its whispers of wisdom, been in awe of its vastness. I wish I could ‘unsee‘ some of the terrible things this human race has done. Deeply disturbing, cruelty, neglect, abandonment. Even ‘Sam’ the dog in I Am Legend had me crying for hours, Ange had to tell me to stop and pull myself together as was only a film. Supervet is a write off. I love the DODO videos. I focus on the good and try to invest in the recovery or prevention.

If you bombard the darkness, and scribble horrors, the dark will remain with darker scars. Donating to the lightbulb to turn the skies sparkly, enables a positive focus to get things done. Actually doing something realistic, instant and practical to help is far more productive in my opinion, than procrastinating and angering. I unfollow the ranters. We’ve adopted 3 cats, 2 that were abandoned. We love them with all of the love that we are. Fundraising for rescues, even if its a small amount – on the scale of things helps. It goes directly to and for the animals not admin. I feel very protective of the vulnerable. So I’ve completed Wiccaweys Music For Dogs EP. (and some relaxing tunes for their owners too) releases on 10th October 2020. I composed the journey of reassurance, rescue, survival, the heart-warming vulnerability of animals, when they find a forever home, acceptance, love, life and in the end for all living beings.. passing over. The track Sleepy Time has been a favourite and relaxed the dogs and humans. (It has been literally road tested with Wiccaweys with the doggies settling down) ‘Goodbye My Friend’ is poignant and very beautiful. Giving something back to the Angels that rescue and care for animals is something we continue to do. Check out https://wiccaweys.co.uk/

Wiccaweys

And finally. I’m still working on my 2021 new album release. ‘Gods’ It is powerful with Eastern influences.

As 2020 heads in to more lockdowns, waves. Love those physically close. Look after those far away. I’ve not hugged either of my parents since March. Its painful. I’m in my own bubble with Ange with the news switched off. Being kind, selfless and creating good vibes, growing my hair back. Otherwise anxiety would become destructive to my emotional wellbeing.

I’ve also been composing more tunes including podcast music/ intros. https://www.pond5.com/collections/3322994-podcast-music

You can also find stock music to purchase by me available on POND5 https://www.pond5.com/artist/claudinewest?utm_campaign=pyw#1/2064

https://www.pond5.com/collections/2710399-uplifting-relaxing-instrumentals

Then the return to jamming with the band Stinking Rita. Battered shoulder after months of not drumming, but worth it. Check out all of our improvised tracks here.

Stinking Rita

I’m really pleased with music work outputs, as was so exhausted and busy in my NHS work at the start of lockdown.

Keep it happy – Claudine

Wilkins Cider Farm, Somerset 2020

Gods Album By Earth Tree Healing

The Deity, God, Supreme Being, Immortal. In these instrumental works, there is a capturing of the pure essence of divine rulers and creators. A respect for their beauty, beliefs, supremacy, power and love.

GODS by Earth Tree Healing released 2nd February 2021. Music links https://linktr.ee/earthtreehealing

Earth Tree Healing – GODS album launch interview with Claudine West & Angela Barker. Watch the discussions with Claudine West and Angela Barker.

The intention said and ask has been made. The musical channelling has begun. It floats and ideas, feelings, notes, sounds rhythms. The week of 22nd July 2020 (my first full week of annual leave for a very long time.) Lockdown in the UK did not provide me with Furlough opportunities. I work full time in the NHS. The first 3 months of working in Procurement during lockdown have seen the biggest challenges and fantastic coming together of teams within the team. ‘Unprecedented.’ A word that has been over used and banned in our household! ‘Some form of normality.’ Dear reader. You know the rest, the story, the news, politics, conspiracies, wrong and right decisions, social media commentary, opinions, facts, truths, manipulations, speculations, lies, arguments, finger pointing, hoarding toilet roll (you can never have enough!) indulgence, weigh gain, dancing nurses, lots of dancing nurses! I stated at the start of this people will be remembered for their actions and behaviours during this. They sure will…

The tragedy of lost loved ones, friends, colleagues has been the hardest. The fear will affect many for years to come. Through the darkness, the grieving, the anger, the why them, why me. The collective love of nations. The clap for carers, for front line workers. For people dropping off food parcels. People fundraising or supporting those who cant help themselves. Some would call you Angels. All are heroes.

Unless of course. You switched it all off, indulged in Netflix. kept safe and entertained yourself and looked after your wellbeing, exercised? Did you? Are you? If you tried meditation for the first time, good habits can create good feelings.

With my soulmate Angela Barker https://angelabarkertarot.com/ suggesting I follow up Goddess (she has been pestering for a while) composing and recording began. Even though I’m busy with other collaborations (some really exciting stuff TBA and released) It was comforting to indulge with Earth Tree Healing music. I sent my intention, meditate, connect.

Track 1 Ganesh

Track 2 Apollo

Track 3 The Dagda

Track 4 Cernunnos Powerful string arrangements and probably maybe my most complex composition arrangements to date with.

Track 5 Lugh

Track 6 Horus

Track 7 Neptune

Track 8 Zephyrus

Track 9 Freyr

Track 10 Dionysus

Track 11 Ra

Track 12 Pan

Track 13 Myrddin

Track 14 Janus

Track 15 Hades

Interview by Angela Barker with Claudine West 25.1.21

The masters have been road tested on trips to Lincolnshire to watch the sky.

Music Links https://linktr.ee/earthtreehealing

GODS Playlist

Earth Tree Healing Music Playlist
Gods by Earth Tree Healing

Claudine West live at the Lincolnshire Well Being Show

When opportunity knocks, the knocking get my mojo dancing and romancing. I spent a wonderful weekend performing sets at Lizian Events Well Being Show. Liz and Ian have given me a fantastic opportunity and challenge to explore and perform ‘Earth Tree Healing’ music live. I embraced, I rehearsed, I took essential hooks and melodies from my repertoire. I improvised and jammed it out, surrounded by stall holders, mediums, the public, ghosts. I premiered this live debut and it felt really good. The trance is the dance of music. With closed eyes a new chapter was born. Electronic tambura, acoustic. This opportunity to reach new audiences cemented how much I do enjoy live performance. Solo or in bands.

Watch: Guitar, keyboards and loop pedal improv

I’d decided from the conception that live meant ‘live.’ Solo recreation of home studio multi tracking of instruments, without cheating to backing tracks. Music is vibrational and gravitational. Using real instruments is satisfying. The feel, the sweat. even ghosts love music. Armed with a loop pedal, my acoustic guitar, digital piano and hand pan drum.

Watch: Tambura, Acoustic Guitar, Handpan Drumming

I’d had a reflexology session with Chandu Solanki on Saturday. Walking on air and tranquility. Sunday. Tamra Butler @ TamPara shoulder/back massage, unblocking stuff and her gifts which are magic, sent me off into land beyond time in a very good way. I ended up almost creating a new album during my 2nd set of the day. Wellbeing and wellness doing what one loves.

Thank you all for the great feedback too! – Claudine

Watch : ‘Happiness’ Piano – from my album ‘Reiki’ 

Claudine West is a multi-instrumentalist and composer at Earth Tree Healing

Music links https://linktr.ee/earthtreehealing

 

 

 

 

Earth Tree Healing live at Lincolnshire Well Being Show 2019

Earth Tree Healing Music will have its live stage performance debut at the Lizian Events

27th and 28th July 2019 at Epic Centre Lincolnshire. (set times TBA)

Lincolnshire Well Being Show Featuring multi-instrumentalist/Composer Claudine West (and live support from Angela Barker)

Music Links 

Lincolnshire Well Being Show Event

Adapting studio recordings in a live environment, with use of a loop pedal is going to be fun and experimental. Capturing the essence, the hooks, raw energy and the vibrations.

Here are a few videos of Claudine in rehearsal

Imbolc

Hand Pan Drum

Brigid

The event will feature the followingRetail stands ~ Fair trade and ethically sourced ~ Aura camera ~ Astrology ~ Books ~ Tarot and Oracle Cards ~ Authors ~ Nutrition Supplements ~ Natural products ~ Skincare and Cosmetics ~ Essential Oils ~ Clothing and Accessories ~ Homeware gifts ~ Incense and burners ~ Wax melts and Candles ~ Jewellery ~ Hand crafted ~ Art ~ Meditation ~ Self Help ~ Rock Salt products and therapies ~ Crystals, Minerals, Carvings ~ Franchise Information ~ Hypnosis ~ Retreats ~ Shamanic items ~ Past Life Regression ~ Spiritual Counsellors Therapies: Indian Head Massage ~ Seated Acupressure Massage ~ Reflexology ~ Reiki ~ Colour & Chakras ~ Spiritual Healing
Demonstrations of Tai Chi and Yoga for all abilities and ages
Live stage performances of music and song
A truly family friendly event, with a Kids Korner providing activities for children to enjoy
Visitors can spend time at the show and leave inspired with ideas of how to become a ‘well being’

Enlight11

 

Goddess Album )0( Earth Tree Healing

Goddess by Earth Tree Healing released 2nd February 2019.  New Age instrumental music From British composer and multi-instrumentalist, Claudine West. Recorded in 2018 in Nottingham.

Available now on digital stores. CD’s from Amazon Music. 

Music Links (iTunes, Spotify, Apple Music, Google Play) Earth Tree Healing Music

https://open.spotify.com/embed/artist/6mPpC4hlyq6kpVHhpPehOx

Watch here:

Track Listing

  1. Artemis
  2. Selene
  3. Hecate
  4. Gaia
  5. Aphrodite
  6. Goddess Temple
  7. Bast
  8. Cerridwen
  9. Morrigan
  10. Brigid
  11. Athena
  12. Lakshmi
  13. Kali
  14. Dance Of The Goddess

Sometimes I create my best works when I feel vulnerable, at a loss with life. My escape into Claudsville, into rapture. Music is my Panacea. I’ve struggle at times with depressive episodes. If I don’t look after myself.  If sustained stress encapsulates me, I fight but eventually crumble into a desert wilderness. Low mood, the fog, hopelessness surrounded me in 2018..many many months.

A sustained draining and soul destroying circumstances bled me to the brink. I’d put on the acting face of ‘everything is ok.’ Eventually my health and wellbeing became cake left out in the rain. Deterioration lead to the inevitable health, emotional and mental health issues. I’d gotten quite poorly so took time out to heal. I didn’t want to lose my relationship or sanity.

Cycling round the lake. Being amongst the beauty of the trees. Meditation, and music making. Months later.. week by week. I began to feel like myself again. It became a very private withdrawn time. Talking about it did not help. My recuperation plan worked. My Lesson: Never let the day job damage and drain me to the walk to the edge of a chasm and dip my toes in the despair. When the sunshine gets shut out during a heatwave, it’s time to swim upon the tides of the moon.

The experience I am grateful of… As I will never have to suffer it again. I won’t allow it to happen again. I let myself down and others by not being fully honest with myself and allowing the harm and anger to take hold. We are all accountable for our actions. Humans can be selfish. Some don’t care about the ripples in the water they create, that build up to tidal waves. Life lessons are there to teach us. In some ways I’m far too sensitive to exist in this maddening world. Put an empath in a tunnel of pain and observe the carnage.

I found Zen creating this album. This infinite and connection to Goddesses.

There were days when I’d call upon a particular Goddess. But a different one appeared. The music poured, oh how it eloquently poured out. It was like lying on snow looking up to the sky. With every detail of snowflakes tinted with rainbows. My breathing returned after being stifled. The warmth embraced and travelled beyond the timeless gentle deeper dark of my meditations. The connection to Earth, Trees.. the healing of the skies. The composing became a cycle of daily therapy. It energised. It comforted. I indulged in sunsets and horizons. It made my world more alright.

The Triple Goddess, The Maiden, The Mother, The Crone )0( I sought Goddess of the hunt, Artemis in the wilderness. Under a magical moon I meditated to Selene. At the crossroads I asked for guidance and protection from Hecate. I became one with the Earth in the woods and the sky with Mother Earth, Gaia. In my darkest times I reached for the sea and asked for the return of feelings and love from Aphrodite. I retreated into meditations often in the Goddess Temple. Protector of Cats, Bast… Our 3 cats were very much part of recording this. I enjoyed further inspiration, music and creativity with Cerridwen. I called upon Morrigan, Goddess of war and fate. To help me endure my battles within. Healing came from The Celtic Goddess of Fire, Brigid, which I have also honoured with my track Imbolc from my album 8 Sabbats  Athena gave me direction and taught me how to better cope. We drove around Snowdonia under blue skies to her sounds. Asking for assistance from Lakshmi Goddess of abundance. We lit candles in the dark. Helping us see the way and what we have to do for the self sustained life we aim for. When you dance with death, there is the liberation of rebirth and Motherly love. I thank Kali. The 14th and final track in this album is Dance Of The Goddess. It comes from Blood Moon We end this journey with honouring and free movement and expression of dance for all. New beginnings…

Breath in the awe-inspiring. Recharge by the sea. Be well, indulge, connect, ask, sleep well.

~ Claudine

Claudine West Music

Music Links 

Apple Music

YouTube Claudine West Channel

Official Site

Claudine West Art on Red Bubble

Claudine West LinkedIn

Soundcloud

Bandcamp

Facebook

Facebook Claudine West Music

Facebook Earth Tree Healing

Twitter

@claudinewmusic

@claudsville75

@earthtreeheal

Instagram Claudine West  @claudsville

Reverbnation

Claudsville Blog https://claudsville.wordpress.com/

Claudine West Art https://claudinewestart.wordpress.com/

The Band

Strange Currencies 

Twitter @strangecu https://twitter.com/strangecu

1
Claudine West 2018

Discography – Earth Tree Healing on digital stores:

  1. Goddess (2019)
  2. Reiki (2018)
  3. Candle Gardeners (2018)
  4. 8 Sabbats (2017)
  5. Archangel Divination 2 (2017)
  6. The Journey (2017)
  7. Archangel Divination (2016)
  8. Citadel (2016)
  9. Meditation Chronicles (2014 only on Bandcamp)

IMG_8748
Claudine West & Angela Barker