Being amongst your tribe is endearing. Having been an outsider, the difficult misunderstood angry, sulky and strange middle child, Lesbian, 5 feet 11″ tall, needing corrective facial surgery for a deformity at 19 years old. More tomboy than girlie girl. Never have and never will fit in. (maybe in another life for the shits and giggles?) Some elements society have not been kind in this one. Social, emotional coping at times is hard, continues. We are the creation of our genetics, Soul Journey, experiences, past lives and environments. My compensation for this has always been the gift musical and artistic talent. The ability to become the hermit and nomad wannabe – with the travel (Escape from ‘Muggletown’) Out of it all. I acknowledge what causes me stress and anxiety, work on how to make that better. Still piss Ange off – my Lady love of life and drive her up the walls and to despair at times. But we have more fun than domestics. (Ange do a pie chart if you want to argue!) P.S. total grammatical correctness eludes me.
On a side thought… you know when you wake up and the whole bedroom smells of fart, was it me, was it Ange? Was it both? As teamwork makes the dream work.
By no means do I music envy major financial success and fame. If I have enough to be comfortable and pay the bills. I’m blessed. The interbred in-crowd bum chums self back patting is not for me. Put me in a room of strangers and ask me to network, talk ‘the’ talk. You simply put me in a nightmare. A face that never fitted even after surgery is fine by me. Focus on creation of ones art and music, and making that good, inspired, energy that flows from somewhere of beautiful connection. Put me in a room of like minded spiritual folk and it all becomes a hell of a lot easier.
On the note of escape. Neither of us pretend to want to remain in Nottingham. We want out. It is time to move on. If I had the opportunity tomorrow. I’d pack my knickers and the cats and go! Ange and I, with a serendipitous worlds colliding discussion over the weekend, lightbulb moments, (Bamboo style salt lamp for us – Thanks Dathan!) of another Ange and synchronicity thrown in. Hope and happiness, opportunities of a better future. Our goal and dream is to live on, work on and open to likeminded souls, the Earth Tree Retreat. We’ve looked at Somerset, Lincolnshire, Wales, Canada, Portugal, other countries. Planning permission is challenging. Money needs to be manifested. We are prepared to start off in our caravan in a field.
But Cornwall… Yes Cornwall! Small seeds, big ideas. Wild flower fields. Practical business beginnings….. Guitars…..Art 😉
The mere mention of the ins and outs of human interaction and imposed restrictions, mask wearing and social distancing. Debating the corrupt shit show that the present procrastinating UK Government is….= Sleaze, cronyism, lobbying, PPE procurement scandals… Shameful, disappointing but not surprising. Greed over life and well being. It goes on and on… Karma, Karma, Karma. The Agarthians, Greys, Reptilians, Tall Whites, must be face planting until it makes a sucky slapping sound…. unless of course…
For all of the arguments, conspiracies, fact, fiction, propaganda, manipulation and opinion. I work in the NHS. I chose that career ‘day job’ because I wanted to help serve patients, poorly people, do something good. It’s not easy, stressful at times. But I’m grateful of the opportunities given. The choice in life to sloth, do nothing with it, receive benefits, ‘poor me’ for ‘poor me’s’ sake or…drum roll… work hard, train, get education, create and embrace opportunities and contribute. Is far more satisfying to me personally. (Disclaimer for the people with real genuine needs) – excluding the fakers, ‘can’t cook, as don’t need to cook, when its all offered on a plate.’ ‘Can do but won’t do.’ Lazy ones whose own worlds apparently owe them something. Now I know some of you cherubs think you have had it hard. There is always someone worse off. It’s not all about you.
On a serious note though. If you are struggling, do seek help. It’s very easy to give advice, rather than deal with your own problems. There is mostly a solution to things. We’ve been given the greatest gift of life adventures. Wasting it, as it’s sometimes far too short, is a regret once you take that peek back from the big sky. Don’t let the bastards get you down either.
We sets me off? PMT, dark winters, work stress. (For however much longer I stay in the NHS very much depends on my experiences in the next 6 months) Keeping topped up with Spiritual practices, meditation/Reiki, exercise, fruit and veg, music, vitamin D and a few good supplements helps my moods immensely. Joy vacuums are best avoided. I have a great faith and strength in the fact that everything is OK. The folk who drag me into their problems, every single time I see them.. it’s a drain. It’s an absolute pleasure when I spend time fun. I was discussing the other day about that rollercoaster some of us experience with people. Sometimes the ones that you look up to, get inspired, learn from massively let themselves and you down with bad actions and behaviours. I’ve found. Sometimes people are in your life for a time, not forever for a reason. It’s an interesting journey. Never lose hope. Not everyone is a fooking wanker! But…. I’m never surprised at the barrage of moaners that are not prepared to stand up and take productive action with their issues. Bitterness and Ego are a recipe for disaster.
Here you go: the advice from 1000 self help books. In a world where the only one that can truly help you once guided (if needed) is actually (newsflash) you. A place where its easier to say rather than do. Denial is a disease. It’s sitting on a bench, looking at a crappy view of a wall, letting pigeons shit on your head.
I also don’t fancy getting a nasty virus so am being extra careful. The End. Well anyway….
During a UK pandemic lockdown easing and happening of our first Well Being Market in April 2021. So, the weekend 24th & 25th April 2021. Our first wellbeing Show, post lockdown easing. Ange and I were very excited. Hardly slept… a negative Lateral Flow Test later. Nostril ticking, throat gag reflex.
Having kept sensible and safe and possibly very lucky too – (this is not a blame game for those who decide to superspread Covid Juice, possibly to vulnerable others, who possibly don’t have super human love and light immune systems.. with their own beliefs)
Just maybe if the dictatorial ‘influencers’ and the spreaders of doom and gloom, hate could maybe be more influential to their social media readers. If they actually just posted positive stuff, ideas, inspiration, their very own fabulous experiences… Hey Ho kidlets …. I see, read, terrible things that humans do. Humans = Kingdom of cock nuggets! Conspiracies – some scary, some hilarious, some food for thought, some poorly evidenced. I’m glad Netflix saved me from reading some of the shite spouted.
2 UK lockdowns later. Our first vaccination done. I’ve not mutated into a reptilian yet. But have cookies, 50p and a Mars bar, organic produce and Tena Lady on hand if needed.
It all is given to Angela Barker if I clog pop (Will is written) and please do help animals.
We had both arrived at the very well ventilated, helping prevent others being on ventilators venue in Newark, Nottinghamshire! Lizian Events Well Being Market. Reassured with completed with negative Lateral Flow tests, followed up with Negative results after the show (Yes a responsible thing to do, yes nothing is 100%) yes there is a YouTube video for just about everything.
I’ve got some underlying health box tickers. I am also mostly responsible for my lifestyle choices, past and present dear health Gurus. I don’t like lurgy of any kind at the best of times or having the shits. So, even though only space suits and ‘no one can hear you scream’ territory are possibly better protection. A medical mask, not a cloth fashion statement…. whilst wandering amongst population may offer some protection from covid/other spatter juice. If someone spat in your face. Would you rather be wearing a mask, or open your mouth and accept the full on phlegm monster is coming? Your choice. I still remember poor Sue on checkouts at Tesco, who was the correct small height for customers sneezing literally directly in her face. A job I suffered in and was always ill in. = Touching money, close public contact, viruses. Glad I left. Some good memories of some fun folks and times though. Lots of bad memories of dick heads (staff and customers) and abuse. Glad I got out, grew up, learned a few harsh lessons and became a better person.
So…I spent the weekend, mainly outside playing my hand pan & tongue drums. Supporting Taiji, with Dr Don & Carol Harradine. ‘Dance of Life.’
Alan Wood (Native American Traditions) Sage Cleansing Ceremony. Angela Barker – Fenix Flames Guided Meditations. (I took my acoustic guitar. I’ll wait until the June Show for more performing)
I’d kicked off the weekend vibrationally with The Pyramid Lady – Gong Sound Therapy by Richard Hissitt. I had a session. Solfeggio tuned metal healing pipes.
Whilst in session I experienced pulsing waves of purple, angelic wings, a feeling of heat, safety, alignment with the Universe. Afterwards, pain relied in my knees, well being, relaxation.
Even though I’ve worked with sound and vibrations most of my life. I was a gong bath virgin until a few years ago. Now I’m an addict. I’ve encountered other worldly beings and bliss. If you’ve not tried one. I can only but recommend.
Music has kept me occupied, satisfied, and accomplished during this hell of a strange 12 Months. Freedom in Pandemic Prison. The meditation escape. Fabulous darlings.
The weekend was a success. Great community spirit. I’m trying to work my way round talking to the exhibitors show by show, to get to know them and what they do. Such a treat after shielding through what has been a long dark winter.
I have my CD’s now for sale. I’m not a sales woman. 18 years of abuse and personal insecurities working in retail. That damage imprint is lasting. Sometime small children take one look at me and their faces say ‘what are you?’ Bob 2? I put the ones that don’t get or connect with me off with Claud vibes.. It grips Anges shit! Can’t talk the talk. Leave it to Ange, best way. She is focusing on her businesses Fenix Flames/Publishing & Angela Barker Tarot. Here business and financial survival (not through the governments grants through lockdown as being newly self employed was entitled to nothing. We sleep better knowing we did not vote them in) Survival through the Lockdowns and thriving business is a testimony to how successful and good she is as a Tarot Reader. She has not stopped. Just adapted readings to do them virtually. Being able to support and help others positively is a life satisfying career.
Maybe in time again I’ll get better at sales technique. So I stick to what I love and a good at – musical contributions at the shows. Lockdown provided the finances for CD duplication of some of my Earth Tree Healing albums.
Yes a blatant plug here if you want a physical copy via Fenix Flames >>> Music
Ange and Ashley are the sales and business talent and drive for not only Fenix Flames with, but for Earth Tree Healing. A massive gratitude high five. Especially Ash for helping with the CD artwork duplications and bits.
Too many great people and businesses to mention at the show.
Enormous thanks to Liz and Ian for their continued support and opportunities.
We originally began as visitors to the shows. Through them, we’ve met friends for life, learned lots via the talks, networked, spent lots on nice and esoteric gifts. Established businesses as stall holders thanks to their support. Honoring the memory and creations of Sarah Louise Kay.
Remember if you do anything this week… be kind. I don’t judge what you identify as. People/Aliens to be are beyond a physical presence. It is your soul honey. You can be a celestial megagon sided rainbow non binary with flashing lights, cheesecake as hair, with bum warts that whistle, that is referred to only by thought, if it makes you feel acknowledged important, noticed and nice. If you behave badly, that is what you are remembered as and known as to me.
Music Links and Kindle Link to my book, ‘Claudsville Blogs and Biog of a Bog Woppit.’
Gong and Pyramid Power